Yesterday my husband, sister, and father shamelessly made fun of me when I assured them I would not scream while giving birth.
I don't blame them because I am a known pampered cry-baby that makes quite the scandal at the doctor's office. I've been embarassing my mom and even my husband with my tantrums even as an adult :S. I happily report that since I've been married I've only misbehaved once at the doctors and have been a good girl ever since.
Obviously, childbirth is not nearly at the pain level for which I've screamed before and thus they are in denial at my statement, but they forget how stubborn I can be when I make up my mind.
A dear co-worker told me that screaming during childbirth takes strength away from the baby. She is an even bigger cry-baby than me and if she can do it without screaming, I most certainly can.
When talking of childbirth and having a baby at home, people are always trying to discourage me from my desire for many children (I want at least more than 4). Most common remarks:
"Once you have your first child, you'll tell me if you still want those 5 or 6 kids."
"Sleep as much as you can because when the baby comes you won't sleep again."
"The cost for having children is too high. I only want two at the most and you should too."
Most common questions:
"Are you scared?"
"Do you know which daycare you'll use?"
"How are you going handle the new expenses?"
Sigh, I get discouraged, but not at my convictions, but at people's heart.
Lets talk about my convictions to get the whole picture:
1. I believe having children is a blessing not a burden.
2. I believe the job I have to do is care for my husband and my children at home.
3. I believe the school is an invention of the world and thus my children will be homeschooled as it was God's intention for a mother to educate her children.
4. Since I will educate my children, I seek to be the most prepared, qualified, and educated teacher for them through study and research (And a year of a Pedagogy Masters) and mainly study of the Word.
5. I believe that whatever need that may come my way, God is my provider, not anyone else, thus I do not worry.
6. I believe that a good help meet for any husband should cut costs in any way she cans. Thus, I'm planning a garden of veggies and berries, I am a prolific DIYER, I learn how to sew, I learn how to cook, I seek the grreener alternative to everything, and I do the work I can myself. So, if I can make it homemade, I'll make it homemade (This includes cleaning products). If I can use non-disposable,budget-saving, but time-consuming diapers, I'll take the time.
I'm sad there aren't many men and women, christian and non-christian, seeking this lifestyle.
Most newly couples say they need to wait till their near 30's for their first child because first they need money and a house of their own. These are also the couples that say two children or less is the best way to go.
Small parenthesis (If you are a couple that fall in this category, please know I do not judge you for your choices. I'm just painting the general picture around me).
For these couples, children are expensive because schooling, clothes, and food are expensive. This is because most believe their kids HAVE to be in the most expensive schools, have to have this or that brand of clothes, and shop at the grocery store or eat out.
There are alternatives!!! Why won't people take them?
Here are many reasons:
1. More children means less comodities.
Yes, it probably means you won't buy the cellphone of your dreams.
2. More children require more time and effort.
Yes, it means you get out of your comfort zone. It means you spend less time on the TV. It means you have less time to do nothing. It means you get more tired. You know what? God also promises strength for you and not more than you can handle.
3. More savings means less indulgence and more work.
Yes, you probably can't go to that beach resort you wanted to go and have to settle for a different vacation.
It means you spend the weekends working on your garden.
4. Surprisingly, most think they can't do it
People thought I wouldn't learn how to cook or how to sew and I'm already producing both. It's funny how they judge me because I will teach my own children saying I'm not suited for it but they paid me to educate THEIR children since I was a teacher for 3 years in formal schools. To these people I always say: Have you even tried? How do you know you can't sew if you've never tried? I've never tried planting a garden and I'm already sure I'll succeed on it, even if it takes me a few tries.
I believe God designed me to be a help meet. In this design, he intended for me to stay home to care for the ones in my family. This is not a prestigious job in the eyes of the world, but the job I was given by God.
Many christian men and women do not desire this for themselves. Husbands want their wives working outside making money to cover their expenses to live more "fully". Wives want to make a career and a name for themselves and even desire to be equal or higher than the men around them .
Right now I have a career and a work. Why? It is the help meet my husband needs right now while he finishes his studies.
"What if your husband still needs you to work outside?" a coworker asked me. "If it is what he requires of me and needs of me, I'll do it. I'm here to be his help meet however he needs it."
I feel blessed that I have a husband though that thinks the same way I do.
My husband understand NO ONE else will educate my children better than me.
He knows it's is a greater benefit for his family and his budget to have me home than outside.
He desires this for myself as well.
If I need to make money, I've been learning skills that would allow me to work from home, including the career I chose (I can program software from my home! ^_^).
The people who saw my nurseries proyects here all said the same thing to me: "These are so pretty you could sell them." Not the purpose for which I did them, but I'm glad God has made me resourceful.
To the remarks and questions made before:
"Once you have your first child, you'll tell me if you still want those 5 or 6 kids."
I don't see why I would change my mind on the convictions God placed in my heart.
"Sleep as much as you can because when the baby comes you won't sleep again."
Myth! Babies can be trained to sleep all through the night at 7 weeks of age (Even earlier). I've never done it and yet I know I'll succeed. Why? I've prepared myself to guide the upbringing of my children, not let them dictate what they'll do; there is plenty of research that proves they can be educated. And as I tell the unbelievers: "If I can teach my month old puppy not to pee inside, I can certainly teach my child what to do."
"The cost for having children is too high. I only want two at the most and you should too."
Thank you for the advice but I rest in God not in the economy or anything else for security. God says many children are a blessing and I believe Him and His Word before anyone elses. Plus, I'm prepared to make the sacrifices for them.
"Are you scared?"
Not at all. I'm anxious if anything. I wish the days went by quicker and Emmalee was already in my arms.
"Do you know which daycare you'll use?"
While my husband finishes his studies and he is able to fully sustain us without me having to work, she will stay with my mother-in-law, a godly women who is the best example of a help meet in my life who will teach my daughter like I would.
"How are you going handle the new expenses?"
Hard work. It doesn't scare us. I see many couples do it with 6 or more children. And so can we!
I just felt I need to share this. I pray more women take this path and make it the desire of their hearts to be homemakers. I pray they understand how important their design is for their families, society, and mainly God.
Matthew 6:21
For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.
I don't blame them because I am a known pampered cry-baby that makes quite the scandal at the doctor's office. I've been embarassing my mom and even my husband with my tantrums even as an adult :S. I happily report that since I've been married I've only misbehaved once at the doctors and have been a good girl ever since.
Obviously, childbirth is not nearly at the pain level for which I've screamed before and thus they are in denial at my statement, but they forget how stubborn I can be when I make up my mind.
A dear co-worker told me that screaming during childbirth takes strength away from the baby. She is an even bigger cry-baby than me and if she can do it without screaming, I most certainly can.
When talking of childbirth and having a baby at home, people are always trying to discourage me from my desire for many children (I want at least more than 4). Most common remarks:
"Once you have your first child, you'll tell me if you still want those 5 or 6 kids."
"Sleep as much as you can because when the baby comes you won't sleep again."
"The cost for having children is too high. I only want two at the most and you should too."
Most common questions:
"Are you scared?"
"Do you know which daycare you'll use?"
"How are you going handle the new expenses?"
Sigh, I get discouraged, but not at my convictions, but at people's heart.
Lets talk about my convictions to get the whole picture:
1. I believe having children is a blessing not a burden.
2. I believe the job I have to do is care for my husband and my children at home.
3. I believe the school is an invention of the world and thus my children will be homeschooled as it was God's intention for a mother to educate her children.
4. Since I will educate my children, I seek to be the most prepared, qualified, and educated teacher for them through study and research (And a year of a Pedagogy Masters) and mainly study of the Word.
5. I believe that whatever need that may come my way, God is my provider, not anyone else, thus I do not worry.
6. I believe that a good help meet for any husband should cut costs in any way she cans. Thus, I'm planning a garden of veggies and berries, I am a prolific DIYER, I learn how to sew, I learn how to cook, I seek the grreener alternative to everything, and I do the work I can myself. So, if I can make it homemade, I'll make it homemade (This includes cleaning products). If I can use non-disposable,budget-saving, but time-consuming diapers, I'll take the time.
I'm sad there aren't many men and women, christian and non-christian, seeking this lifestyle.
Most newly couples say they need to wait till their near 30's for their first child because first they need money and a house of their own. These are also the couples that say two children or less is the best way to go.
Small parenthesis (If you are a couple that fall in this category, please know I do not judge you for your choices. I'm just painting the general picture around me).
For these couples, children are expensive because schooling, clothes, and food are expensive. This is because most believe their kids HAVE to be in the most expensive schools, have to have this or that brand of clothes, and shop at the grocery store or eat out.
There are alternatives!!! Why won't people take them?
Here are many reasons:
1. More children means less comodities.
Yes, it probably means you won't buy the cellphone of your dreams.
2. More children require more time and effort.
Yes, it means you get out of your comfort zone. It means you spend less time on the TV. It means you have less time to do nothing. It means you get more tired. You know what? God also promises strength for you and not more than you can handle.
3. More savings means less indulgence and more work.
Yes, you probably can't go to that beach resort you wanted to go and have to settle for a different vacation.
It means you spend the weekends working on your garden.
4. Surprisingly, most think they can't do it
People thought I wouldn't learn how to cook or how to sew and I'm already producing both. It's funny how they judge me because I will teach my own children saying I'm not suited for it but they paid me to educate THEIR children since I was a teacher for 3 years in formal schools. To these people I always say: Have you even tried? How do you know you can't sew if you've never tried? I've never tried planting a garden and I'm already sure I'll succeed on it, even if it takes me a few tries.
I believe God designed me to be a help meet. In this design, he intended for me to stay home to care for the ones in my family. This is not a prestigious job in the eyes of the world, but the job I was given by God.
Many christian men and women do not desire this for themselves. Husbands want their wives working outside making money to cover their expenses to live more "fully". Wives want to make a career and a name for themselves and even desire to be equal or higher than the men around them .
Right now I have a career and a work. Why? It is the help meet my husband needs right now while he finishes his studies.
"What if your husband still needs you to work outside?" a coworker asked me. "If it is what he requires of me and needs of me, I'll do it. I'm here to be his help meet however he needs it."
I feel blessed that I have a husband though that thinks the same way I do.
My husband understand NO ONE else will educate my children better than me.
He knows it's is a greater benefit for his family and his budget to have me home than outside.
He desires this for myself as well.
If I need to make money, I've been learning skills that would allow me to work from home, including the career I chose (I can program software from my home! ^_^).
The people who saw my nurseries proyects here all said the same thing to me: "These are so pretty you could sell them." Not the purpose for which I did them, but I'm glad God has made me resourceful.
To the remarks and questions made before:
"Once you have your first child, you'll tell me if you still want those 5 or 6 kids."
I don't see why I would change my mind on the convictions God placed in my heart.
"Sleep as much as you can because when the baby comes you won't sleep again."
Myth! Babies can be trained to sleep all through the night at 7 weeks of age (Even earlier). I've never done it and yet I know I'll succeed. Why? I've prepared myself to guide the upbringing of my children, not let them dictate what they'll do; there is plenty of research that proves they can be educated. And as I tell the unbelievers: "If I can teach my month old puppy not to pee inside, I can certainly teach my child what to do."
"The cost for having children is too high. I only want two at the most and you should too."
Thank you for the advice but I rest in God not in the economy or anything else for security. God says many children are a blessing and I believe Him and His Word before anyone elses. Plus, I'm prepared to make the sacrifices for them.
"Are you scared?"
Not at all. I'm anxious if anything. I wish the days went by quicker and Emmalee was already in my arms.
"Do you know which daycare you'll use?"
While my husband finishes his studies and he is able to fully sustain us without me having to work, she will stay with my mother-in-law, a godly women who is the best example of a help meet in my life who will teach my daughter like I would.
"How are you going handle the new expenses?"
Hard work. It doesn't scare us. I see many couples do it with 6 or more children. And so can we!
I just felt I need to share this. I pray more women take this path and make it the desire of their hearts to be homemakers. I pray they understand how important their design is for their families, society, and mainly God.
Matthew 6:21
For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.
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