Rise to the occasion (Adding goodness to your faith part 4)

Sometimes I don't want to. I don't want to say yes. I don't want to be there for that friend.
Sometimes being a friend is hard to do.
Especially if the past hurts me.
When they discarded my friendship but require it when they are in need.
When they betrayed my trust.
When they distance themselves from me because they don't like it when I confront them with their sin.
When they have been dishonest.
When they are only there in the good times.
When they just want to talk of their needs but never listen to mine.

And the list could go on.
And then I stopped and realize I have been that friend to Jesus. I have...
And yet, He is always there.
Always loving, always receiving, always with arms stretched wide.
And I want to be like Him, don't I?
And what am I doing to be more like him?

And that is just a small list of people I don't feel like being their friend anymore.
What about those I don't even want to befriend:
The preachy guy who always has an opinion on what I do.
The talkative girl who exaggerates every thing she says.
Those who seem too weird.
Those who only speak of the mundane.
The guy who is a little harsh and cold when he talks to you.
The girl pretending to be something she is not.
First of, those are ALL judgments and again God NEVER gives us license to judge.
Secondly, maybe I'm the preachy, talkative, exaggerating, weird, mundane, harsh, pretender to others. (Most likely and altogether)

There is someone in my life I noticed calling out for help. That person has been trying to get close to me. I didn't want to let that person close. I resisted that friendship. We had been friends in the past and that friendship had been disappointing to me.
"Is it my obligation to be there" I asked myself. "Does God require it of me?"
The answer is yes, but the problem is not in the command to love others but in the fact that before I say "no" I am seeking if it is "required" and if I have a way out of it instead of rising to the occasion with a prompt "yes".
The problem is not the others.
The problem is my heart.

There was once a time were the thing I most strived for in my life was radical living for Christ.
Radical:
Adjective
(esp. of change or action) Relating to or affecting the fundamental nature of something; far-reaching or thorough.

I like this part: far-reaching. 

I don't think that someone who is looking for a way out is looking to far-reach, do you?

What is so wrong with my heart that I would rather look at my friend's past transgressions instead of their need. And let me tell you something, if this person is seeking ME it's because this person is desperate because I'm not much help or good company. 

I'm a disappointing friend too. Recently a very dear friend lost her great grandmother and I was unable to go to the funeral and be by her side. I'm also a very absent friend always busy with work, duty, and family. And sometimes I'm too busy for family, barely seeing my sister and father who live accross the street from me. 

Where is my heart of a servant?

Where is my heart that feels compassion for others?

Where is my heart that seeks be like Jesus, love like Jesus, comfort others like He has comforted me? 

If I numbered the reasons I resist this friend you would probably side with me. But in the Christ-centered life they are just excuses and pride. And in the light of Jesus' love for me, they are a reminder that Jesus would have more reasons to resist me. 

Matthew 5

43 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ 44 But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45 that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. 46 If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? 47 And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? 48 Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.

Let's rephrase that to: "If you love those who like you,", "if you those you like," "if you love those who are good friends," "if you love those who never fail you (and there is not such thing)," what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? 

Where are you, Linda, being RADICAL?

Dear Lord, 

I'm sorry. My heart has been self-absorbed, self-centered. I've let my pride take the reigns of my heart instead of love and compassion. Let me not require brokeness always in order to examine this heart of mine; let me be transformed by your example and unconditional love towards this lowly sinner. I've been told I've been more tender and caring since becoming a mommy. Let this be true. Let my heart be more sensitive to others and be radical in my love and life. Let me not be looking to do the minimum but finding ways to do more, to be more for You. This I want for my daughter, this I must live. I often tell people she appears to have her father's tender and gentle temperament. It should be mommy's too. Lord teach me and transform me. You are able to do great things in me and in adding goodness I add faith believing You can and will.

Thank Jesus for loving me as I am. 

I forever love You.  

Do not become weary of doing Good (Adding Goodness to your faith Part 3)

Lets consider this Part 3 to adding Goodness to your Faith....
Inspiration to write hasn't hit me lately.
I write only when I have something I want to say.
Hmmm... Have I had nothing to say lately?

I usually write when I want to share what the Lord has been doing in my life and all that He's been teaching me.
It's not that He hasn't been teaching me lately or doing something in my life. Maybe I've been a little reluctant to share that that He's been doing. 
Since Fumoffu's departure, there have been some series of events that have surely shocked my darling baby. 
Fortunately, I've been able not to worry much; I've trusted God fully that He is control with the baby's health, and I've been at peace and thoroughly cared for by my hubby.

Today's subject is more of a lecture to myself.
"Let us not become weary in doing good."

Lately I feel extremely annoyed after a weekend serving in the church band or church group.
You can read about that here and here.

This weekend was all about my pregnacy.
Last week I had a bad case of irritable bowel syndrome and my belly (and I'm not joking or exaggerating) pretty much doubled in size.
It got so bad I had to go to the hospital on Thursday to have meds through IV to help with the pain and swelling. 
Everywhere I go people feel the need to comment on how huge my belly is and how huge my baby must therefore be. Sigh.
People that have never spoken to me before!
And it's one thing to have my friends ask me if the baby is kicking, how far in the pregnancy I am, when is my due date, and anything they want to ask, even caress the belly;
but to have total strangers who have never before had the decency to say a hello do all that!!
GRRRRR!
I've never been a touchy-feely girl so I'm not so much into hugs and all that, and to have strangers touch me! TOUCH ME! AHHHHH!!!!!!
Show me the emergency Exit now!

Excuse me, readers, this is my flesh and human nature pouring out.
By the end of Saturday, I was really wishing my stomach would start acting out again so I'd have an excuse not to repeat the experience on Sunday.
Important life lesson: When your weakness is showing, it's the best opportunity to let God be strong and teach you. Find His teaching in your weakness!

What is the teaching in this noticeable sinful thinking and annoyed nature?
Two things:
1. People who have never spoken to you before are approaching you because of your pregnancy. Why not use that for God's glory in making acquaintances and friends and letting people in so you might serve them and bless them? Even people out of church are approaching you. Why not use it to expand the gospel instead of thinking of your petty discomforts of being touched and questioned?
2. Serving in church is not easy. If at one point it was, your heart was probably at a better place. If it isn't, you still have no excuse because you have been called not to grow weary.

Galatins 6
7 Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. 8 Whoever sows to please their flesh, from the flesh will reap destruction; whoever sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. 9 Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. 10 Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.

Have you been asking God to be His hands and feet and found yourself annoyed when an opportunity to be just that comes along. Have you noticed it?
Have you meditate on it? It is usually at the time we pray God to use us that it becomes the hardest. Remember, Satan is at play.

What an important part faith has here. How many times have I heard people say they've served God and have received nothing in return! First of all, are you doing things to receive something in return or to give God glory. Let us never forget the reason we do things! But the verse comes with promise; a promise only received by faith: at the proper time we will reap.

Add goodness to your faith by not giving up!

And what a great way to changed the annoyed thought than with gratefulness:
*493 Fumoffu's life and love. She is truly missed because of how extraordinary pet she was and how deeply she was loved. Thank you.
*494 a willing and loving husband that cares for his pregnant wifey.
*495 despite the minor mishap, this pregnant lady has enjoyed great health.
*496 maternity clothes sent by mom. SOOOOO extremely blessed by them, especially the pants! Thanks for the pants mom!
*497 mommy's trip to europe! Oh lala! Excuse me and my Italian vacations! So happy for the blessings You give her.
*498 Aunt Jenny's Italian wedding. Bless them and teach them to be a Christ-centered family.
*499 Pit's salsa weekend with Caroly. Glad they had fun.
*500 A huge, humongous, gianormous house. Seriously, I get tired walking from the kitchen to the bathroom in that monster of a house. How lucky!
*501 A house to host surprise birthday party for my boss. Glad she was happy and blessed.
*502 Noisy dogs. I feel like murdering them cause they bark at nothing and scare the hubs, but I'm still grateful for them.
*503 a weekend serving in church without much stomach problems and feet discomfort. Finding clothes that fit me to sing in stage before the maternity clothes arrived :)
*504 a nursery in progress. LOVE the DIY proyects I've been entertained with
*505 lodging Rodol's friends from San Pedro Sula.
*506 the hubs spending time with his long-time-no-see friends. 

Adding Faith: A lesson on contentment

The Lord is teaching me contentment.
It is good He is pointing me towards this direction because of the drastic changes that have happened in our lives and are yet to come.
In the past months of 2012 we have:
1. Bought a car
2. Had a new pet additioned to our family
3. Gotten pregnant
4. Moved into a house

And it's wonderful to move forward and all these changes have been huge blessings.
Yet ALL represent debts and expenses. The car loan plus gas bills, the dog food and vet expenses, the prenatal meds and monthly ob-gyn bills, the doubled house rent. Sigh.
Take a deep a breath!
Curiously enough, I was more overwhelmed last year that this year. Difference? Gratitude.

God has been beyond good to us. Somehow, He provides for us be it through help from my mom, help from the in-laws, help from family and friends, credit card rewards, or even extra hours and extra projects in the job. Our lives haven't nearly faced their most drastic change yet: parenthood. Friends who know our financial situation and our schedules constantly ask me: "What are you guys gonna do once the baby comes?" My answer: "I don't know, but I'm not worried."

I thinks this is 90% true. I'm still working on my adding faith. And probably when the baby is here I'll worry some more. But God's lesson today is contentment.
Today I read an article on blog I ♥ about contentment. The article was from Jeremiah Burroughs and he said that to have contentment, true contentment, we must first suffer discontent.
When speaking of contentment, Paul used the word "learned" several times. This made me wonder why I have only started to learn the power of gratitude.

Philippians 4:11-13

For I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.

Looking back on my life, I've really had it all. Mom provided everything and I never had a worry in the world. She even provided for a maid to take care of my meals, laundry, and cleaning. I feel foolish of the "problems" for which I used to lose sleep (which is why I feel like slapping a teenager when he complains because of school work!). It seems ironic that I didn't learn gratitude when I had it all and now that it's a struggle I'm more grateful than ever. It was easy to have contentment when what I wanted (not what I needed) came easy as well.

I've always reminded myself and others to have contentment when you put your situation into perpective with others' situations. I think now this thinking, although effective, is a crutch. Yes, when you realize how much harder it is for others or how much less than you they have, it helps you feel better about your situation. Does ts is make you LEARN contentment like Paul had? No! True contentment is "through HIm."

Today I came across a verse in Acts 5 right after the apostles had been unjustly imprisoned because they kept preaching in Jesus' name and flogged when they were released:

Act 5:41

The apostles left the Sanhedrin, rejoicing because they had been counted worthy of suffering disgrace for the Name.

THESE men knew true contentment and knew it through the joy of suffering for Christ's name.

Dear Lord,
That I may learn this true contentment through You, even in suffering and struggle, and in abundance and happiness as well. I rejoice in my sufferings and the teaching it has brought to my life and in seeking You harder. I rejoice in Your providence and choose to rest in You alone. Thank You for all the things You are doing in our lives and bless the child growing in me.
I forever love You!

Step 1. To your Faith add Goodness (Part 2)

In my attempt at walking by faith, I'm trying to go more to church despite my health and despite the time, (I usually don't go anywhere after 8 pm unless it's a saturday and the hubs convinces me. If I'm out at night, I usually end up with a bad case of allergies or asthma).
Yesterday, I managed to drag my body to a meeting at church I was called to two hours beforehand. However, I completely failed at adding goodness to my faith.

You see, we miss alot of church meeting because of my health. It is something that burdens me. Honestly, we don't go to church group on Friday not because we don't want to, but because come Friday I'm extremely tired and I just want to go home to lay my head. In that faith walking, we are going to start attending group on Friday.
Last week was our first visit to a group in a long time. It was encouraging to see people happy to see us there, but it was more burdening than anything.
People started asking us if we were going to start going every Friday and if we were not gonna miss anymore group. This got on my nerves.

In all honesty, sometimes we don't go to church not because I'm not feeling fine, but because we just don't want to see the people there just to hear them question why we haven't been to church lately. To me it's like: "Do you care why I haven't come or just that I haven't come?" My husband is a kind, gentle person who will always answer patiently. I wish I were more like him. People come over to ask him why we haven't been to church. He patiently gives them an answer, and they just brush it off as an excuse. My husband won't show you his disapproval of your comments and opinions, but they are getting on his nerves as well.

On last Friday's group, they invited my husband to a men's meeting on Monday. My husband is on his test week at college. As we were entering the meeting yesterday, a guy from the group asked him why he hadn't gone to the meeting on Monday. Again, as per usual, my husband kindly tried to explain that he was up all night studying. The guy immediately dissmissed his explanation and started joking around of his "irresponsibility." Here is where I failed to practice goodness, my friends. I got so angry at his "jokes" and judgments I snapped at him. "He already gave you an answer. If that is not good enough for you, that is your problem not ours," I harshly responded.

Oh great! Now I was there feeling terribly angry at the same welcome of always and terribly ashamed of how I had reacted. The hubs of course called my attention for my response, not that he needed to. I knew I had been wrong. I waited till the end of the meeting to approach this guy and ask for forgiveness.

I was seriously starting to wonder what church is about and why I don't want to go anymore. What is more important: my attendance or my life? Because all I see is that they don't care about our lives; they care if we're faithfully attending or not. Don't they not know me or my husband? Weren't we there every meeting before my health issues?
How come when we tell them we aren't going to church because I'm very sick none of the "questioners" call to ask how I'm doing or visit? None of them ask my husband how he is coping with caring for his wife almost every week. Do they know he feels burdened or frustrated and oftentimes alone, and he doesn't want to spend his weekend locked up in the house? Do they know our financial problems because of our medical bills? Dear reader, I'm crying as I write this down.

I was inmensely touched by the fact that Pastor Gustavo wrote me asking how I was because he was worried he hadn't seen me in a while. "How are you?" instead of the usual "Why haven't you been to church?"
Now that I find myself in these situations I'm truly grateful. In the past, I was a prolific "questioneer." This was my attitude towards "church slackers" as well.

Please don't get me wrong. I don't think my brothers and sisters in Christ are ill-intentioned at all. The guy from last night surely didn't deserve my attitude towards him.
What happens is that it's hard to be truly interested in someone's life and most of the time you don't even realize what your comments and opinions do to someone.
And I fail even more at faith and goodness here. I'm not giving my brothers and sisters a chance, and I'm instead feeling exasperated by them. Im justifying reasons for not going to church that shouldn't be based on what others do but on what I do and I need. Even last night's altercate served me in learning how to add goodness. Actually, the harder the showing goodness becomes the strong the faith is rooted.

To your faith add goodness...

The dictionary defines goodness as:
noun
1. the state or quality of being good.
2.moral excellence; virtue.
3.kindly feeling; kindness; generosity.
4.excellence of quality: goodness of workmanship.
5.the best  part of anything; essence; strength.

As I told you, I failed at adding goodness.
If I'm gonna trust my church is where God has taken me, then I must grow in goodness.
What will this imply?
I won't be offended by others, but return love and forgiveness and non-judgmental thoughts to them.
I will answer kindly and patiently, or simply be quiet and let my husband answer kindly while I learn from him.

Psalm 23:6
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever.
Psalm 65:4
Blessed is the one you choose and bring near, to dwell in your courts! We shall be satisfied with the goodness of your house, the holiness of your temple!

The house of the Lord... Is it Church? Are goodness and mercy shown to you there? More importantly, are you showing it?
The house of the Lord... Communion with God? Surely delicious to my soul and flesh. Are you seeking it always?

Goodness is only found in God. Only He is good.
Such an important realization of our state. None of us are good. Therefore, we may only learn goodness from God and through Him. This also means He teaches goodness from others that pick it up from Him. This is what you must strive to be and strive to be around. Friday group is a good starting place!

Life is not easy. This is the very reason you are learning this steps.
It is not easy to have faith. It is not easy to have goodness.
It is easy to come to the Lord. It is easy to come in prayer.
It is easy to pick up His Word and tie it to our necks.
And thus, it is easy to have faith and easy to imitate His goodness. 

Step 1. To your Faith add Goodness (Part 1)

I wanted to do a series on 2 Peter 2:5-10 but was unable to because of illness.
I'm happy to report I'm feeling much better and baby is doing fine.

If you remember my last post on these verses, I mentioned seven steps although there were 8.
Step 1 is to your faith add goodness, but for this you would have to have faith to start with.
Is the fact that I believe in Jesus as my one and only Saviour and the Son of God, and pray to Him count as having faith?
Is faith far greater than that? Is this a good starting point?

Hebrews 10
38 And,
“But my righteous one will live by faith.
    And I take no pleasure
    in the one who shrinks back.”

Live by faith...
I've confessed in the past that I think I'm lacking in faith.
I am always expecting the worst.
Seriously! If I go to the doctor and have to take him a medical test result, I'm certain it is positive. Sometimes even after he has told me it's not!
I've been ordering my mind to ignore these thoughts when it comes to the baby. It has proven quite effective. I guess this is why in the things God commands us to do He includes controlling our thoughts, and not doing so is a sin.
You can control your thoughts if you chose the right thought. Interesting.
By experience, I've learned that the right thought comes out of the Word.
"Nobody loves you and you are all alone," my teenage brain would tell me. "And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.," my Bible and sweet Jesus said! And I replaced this thoughts for His words.
My favorite teacher Mr Greene once told me that every sin can be pinpointed to a lie we believed.
His example of this was especially directed at me: "Why do we worry? Because eventhough God has told us He takes care of us, we don't truly believe it."

A couple of weeks ago we were visiting our dear friends Johnny and Meli, and we had a very interesting discussion about married life and marriage relationships.
It was refreshing to have friends you could talk openly and honestly about married life and really not try to hide or pretend it's always perfect, we never fight, and we never have problems or disagreements.
Johnny was talking about the woman's submission to her husband. Mel and I were saying it's sometimes hard because we are seeing that our husbands are gonna make a wrong decision.
So Johnny asked me: "Then is your obedience to submit to your husband in the fact that your husband makes good decisions or the fact that God commands you to submit and, if you do so, He is in control?"
Do I trust God when He commands me to trust my husband's leadership or I'm a believing the lie that I have to "try to control things" or else it won't go right?

Is it faith versus lies?
I think it is. Is faith believing God's words are truth and thus completely following and trusting them? I believe so.

I'm still afraid of my fears coming true, tha come December there is a chance I might not be holding my baby.
I've been reading a blog from an Australian nomadic family that was stricken with tragedy and the loss of their youngest in a disconcerting way.
She hasn't stopped blogging through the whole situation and is capable of speaking of love, hope, and compassion.
Her oldest asked her is everything that happens is good. Even in all she is enduring, she firmly states a "yes"; everything is in God hands, hence everything is good.

I'm gonna walk in faith. And in that faith, I'm gonna start planning and working on a nursery. 
Mark 9
21 Jesus asked the boy’s father, “How long has he been like this?”
“From childhood,” he answered. 22 “It has often thrown him into fire or water to kill him. But if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us.”
23 “‘If you can’?” said Jesus. “Everything is possible for one who believes.”
24 Immediately the boy’s father exclaimed, “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!”

“I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!” Tis my prayer.

So, to sum it all up, the step for today is a two step:
1. Replace your thoughts for God's Word. For this you need to be on the Word.
2. Pinpoint the lies you believe that leads you to disobedience and mistrust. More time in the Word would also be effective. :)
I know I haven't actually gone to the add goodness part, but I just refuse to mess with the 7 steps :P

Not Monday, but grattitude is good any day.
*471 my first diapers sent from Panama by eager Grandma Linda
*472 Still not being able to move to our new house.
*473 In-laws receiving us in their home will we wait for the house
*474 my sister learning through the hardships of the work place
*475 my sister learning she is not alone in those sufferings
*476 my pups behaving while we are away from home
*477 my health improving enough to enjoy time with my husband more
*478 the awesome relationship the hubs and I have been experiencing the past weeks. I can't go by three hours without calling him to find out how he is and viceversa.
*479 the hope the house will be done this week
*480 planning a whole homestead
*481 dreaming of a garden with tomatoes and berries and more
*482 planning a nursery and beginning small projects
*483 Grandpa Edgardo is making the crib!
*484 Adina's visit bearing daisies for her sick "mommy."
*485 My darling daughter Adina surviving her first ironman placing in 7th eventhough she was hit by a car in the bike trail! :O Is she amazing or what?
*486 a lunch with darling daughters Denise and Sarai to celebrate Sarai's birthday
*487 the hub's test week.
*488 classmates willing to help the hubs study. I love them so dearly
*489 Precious Uncle Paolo bearing gifts! A whole box of toys for sweet baby.
*490 a darling Father I can pray to anytime all the time.
*491 pizza making with Izell and Jenny while the guys watched the EuroCup final
*492 Sweet puppy time whilst visiting Johnny and Meli. I'm sorry, but I'll be visiting more! There are few things that fill my heart with so much joy like lying in the ground with puppies biting my hair, nose, ears, and face.

P.S. readers, stick around to see my DIY projects for the nursery, my attempt at home making, and the future series on pregnancy and baby's sex!!

Control your feelings or let your feelings control you?

Dear Lord,

I stress and can't control it.
I thoght that was it.
I was wrong.

No wonder I was happy being a teacher. Don't get me wrong, being a teacher is not a piece of cake.
Maybe it's because I enjoyed it so much and I had such a deep love for my students, but
I've never been under so much stress in my life like in the whirlwind world of the computer programer.

I'm glad I have. Stress, frustration, pressure, or anger makes the worst come out of you.
Sadly, that worst comes out in an office environment for everyone to see.
To say that I haven't lived up to my "christian" testimony would be an understatment.
I've been very grateful for this, though.
1. It has made me realize I'm not the goody two-shoes I was so intent in making everyone believe I was, including myself. Yes, the realization has been mainly to myself.
This does wonders in crushing my pride.
2. It has challenged me to learn to be the difference. Knowing something and doing it are two very different things. Just because I've been taught all my life God's ways and principles doesn't mean I automatically follow them like I thought I would, including my marriage.

Stress brings the worst in me. My tolerance, kindness, softness, respectfulness, and much more is reduced to 10% when I'm stressed.
So, control your feelings or let your feelings control you? That, dear Shakespear, is the real question!
But then a question would come out of that one: Can you control your feelings?
Can you?

James says that the man who can control his tongue is perfect. Perfect.
Can you say confidently like Paul, "Imitate me because I imitate Christ"?
Paul is nice enough to let us know he is still human though, and how he is able to press forward.

Philipians 3

 13 Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead,

The extremely stressing environment of my work has been excuse long enough.
I love Peter's advice:

2 Peter 2

5 For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge;6 and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness;7 and to godliness, mutual affection; and to mutual affection, love. 8 For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. 9 But whoever does not have them is nearsighted and blind,forgetting that they have been cleansed from their past sins.

10 Therefore, my brothers and sisters,[a] make every effort to confirm your calling and election. For if you do these things, you will never stumble, 11 and you will receive a rich welcome into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

The first words that would pop out for me were "will never stumble and rich welcome." These are the words I covet and desire.
There is a good reason why we stumble and I've come to begin to learn to stop fearing stumbling.
However, as I now don't jump to the end and wish to strain toward what's ahead, there are new words popping:
"Make every effort, increasing measure, ineffective and unproductive, nearsighted, forgetting.."

This practical girl and reforming control freak is very happy to have the steps numbered and in an order:
1. to your faith add goodness,
2. to your goodness, knowledge,
3. to your knowledge, self-control,
4. to your self-control, perseverance,
5. to your perseverance, godliness,
6. to your godliness, mutual affection,
7. to your mutual affection, love!

Isn't it awesome they're 7 steps?! It's my favorite number! :P
You see, I was only trying for self-control right now.
Where has that landed me? Lets take a look:
1. I say less bad words. Not enough. I shouldn't say one.
2. I don't treat others badly when I'm stressed. Not enough. I should treat them kindly always, not just "not bad."
3. I have murmured less. Not enough. My attitude should always be grattitude.
4. I bite my tongue better. Not enough. I should be striving for "if anything is excellent or praiseworthy, think about such things."

You see, self-control alone won't produce in me godliness or mutual affection, let alone love!
And my "self-control" without faith, goodness, and knowledge before will never be true self-control. It will just be a means to give "a better image of myself, miss goody two-shoes again."

My dear friend Kenny, who happens to be fellow christian (thank You for christian co-workers!) was trying to give me tips on controlling my stress.
And then he finally gave me an advice that I could use (yes, I'm still dealing with others telling me what to do to not stress and finding it hard to swallow).
I had given up. There is no way I can control my stress. Is there?
And Kenny said: "Wake up every morning and pray for your stress beforehand."
Hmmmmm..
That's a good start for step 1. Step one is actually having faith (Shhh, don't say anything. This messes up my 7 steps awesomeness :P).
Do I have faith God can control my stress and do something about it?

So, as I refuse to be ineffective and unproductive in my Christian life, today I begin to take steps putting every effort in them.
Step 1: Wake up every morning and pray for my stress. Linda, work in this step before you're already trying to jump on the adding goodness. Do so fervently and diligently.
And my sweet friends, you my awesome readers, you are welcomed in praying for my stress and my baby's health each morning too. I will highly appreciate it!  Let me know if you got a step for yourself for me to pray for it.

I love You, Jesus.
Let me not forget that we have been cleansed from our past sins,
and have mercy over me, oh God,
according to your unfailing love,
according to your great compassion
blot out my transgressions. :)